Is running away the best option?
Hi, I'm 14 years old and live in a small town near Bristol. For the past 3/4 years I have been constantly arguing with my parents (mainly my dad) We've never gotten on but in the last year I have been becoming angrier and angrier. I have a twin sister which is a complete nightmare, all of her friends are my friends and i can never do my own thing. Everything is such a competition... My dad and myself occasionally have serious fights, they say i have anger management which i believe i do but can't really be bothered to do anything about it... I've seen a counselor before and all she did was listen and take notes, WTF. When my parents get angry at me they take away everything and anything that i use on a daily basis or just love full stop. This ranges from my mobile to my laptop and above all my xbox which i saved up for out of my Job money. I went camping with some friends without their permission and came back and obviously knew there were going to be consequences however this time it's different. I don't mind that much about my xbox being gone. My dad follows me around the house, and is literally obsessed with our kitchen which he spent thousands of pounds on. He's such a fucking twat and honestly hate him... I get angry so easily with him, not my mum or my sister. Just him. But whenever we have guests over he's a different person and always acts so much nicer with my friends! Two faces prick. I'm also very tall for my age (6ft 2) and apparently seem intimidating to my parents which I don't try to be! Me and my dad fight all the time, and in the last week I've stolen from him, smashed things up, thrown various objects around the house, broken walls and broken an ironing board and bruised his rib causing him to be on the most effective pain killers available. I had another fight with him about 2 hours ago from when I wrote this, he does it all for a reaction. My parents both want me to talk to them and try and move on but I can't this time. I just want to be left on my own and I can't have that. They've called the police on me and probablyy going to report me for some sort of physical abuse. What should I do?
Thanks
US $199.99
Running away is NEVER the option… where will you go? How will you eat/bathe etc?? And you do know once they find you if you don’t end up crawling back for food and water (because even if you ask your friends to help you, they can’t provide for you forever) they will find you and if the police is involved they will keep a record if told to by your parents. And another thing.. you’ll lose all sense of trust from your parents as well. I say, the best option would to talk it out… if talking does not work then you seek help else where !!
Sounds like a rough situation. I was in a similar situation in high school. It sucks having no independence, sucks when it seems like the world’s out to get you and whatever you say will start a big fricking argument.
Once you get to college and have independence, everything gets better. Trust me on that.
But before then, you’ve got to look within yourself for ways to deal with it. One thing that can help is not getting so involved in the drama. Don’t get so involved in it that you start yelling. Just approach it from an I-don’t-care-to-argue perspective.
Another thing that’s important is to pursue something you’re passionate about. If you’re really into something, you’ll be way happier while you’re pursuing it. Whatever hobby it might be.
Honestly, the greatest thing is probably to surround yourself by nature. If you’re anywhere where there’s a forest preserve or lake around you, go there. Not only will you be completely independent there, but you’ll gain some perspective. You’ll realize that no matter what ’seemingly horrible’ things happen in your life, the beauty that exists in nature will always be there. You can always go there and your problems are fleeting because it’s just you and nature.
Running away is always pointless because you’re not going to escape whatever issues are going on in your life, you’re not going to escape forever, and when you come back you’ll be stuck in counseling. Everyone who hears about you running away will think you have issues too. Let nature be your temporary escape.
And in the mean time, try to understand your family members’ perspective. Think of how much your parents have done for you, even if they went about it the wrong way. Think of how they must feel after they’ve tried to raise a son and that son talks treats them like dirt. Like I said, I was in such a similar situation. Now my relationship is fixed, and I’m at home on Thanksgiving break enjoying being with them. I feel horrible about the way I treated them too, in part because my wild teenage emotions have naturally grown up.
Oh, and working out is great. You’ll have a channel to source all your anger (pushing yourself as hard as you can, getting mad ripped). You’ll feel healthier, feel better about yourself, and it will vastly improve your lady-life.
Life is a blessing man. You’ll see.
Zach